This wasn’t really the official first real post I wanted to do, but nothing else feels worth it right now.
On Thursday, October 29th, we came home to find our dear sweet Oxford underneath some bushes by the driveway. He didn’t run up and chase the car like he always does when we come home. He didn’t do anything. He just lied there, under the leaves and the branches. We knew he was gone.

We think that he might have been hit by a car and made his way home. Maybe he just didn’t want us to think that he had run away. Maybe he was looking for us. I don’t know. I just know that it’s been 2 1/2 days already and all I can do is cry for my sweet puppy.
He was so young. He was just under a year old.

All day on Thursday, I kept thinking that I should have put him inside. He just loved to run around so much and it was a nice day and I didn’t want to keep him cooped up. I just wish I had put him inside. He would still be here with me. Instead all I have is a memory.

I keep looking outside and expecting him to come bouncing down the driveway, just back from visiting Bear across the street or the ugly hound dog that was his buddy.

I keep thinking I’m going to open the front door to let him in and just see him sitting on the stoop or sitting on the plastic wicker chair that is on the porch.
I miss him jumping on me and sometimes being a “bad dog” and thinking how much of a good dog he was becoming. I miss him laying on the couch next to me at night. I miss everything. He was always so happy to see us. He would steal Enzi’s toys and chew them all up. I’m thinking of him every time I see a chew mark on something.

We tucked him into the Wall-E blanket that he laid on every chance he had even though it was Enzi’s. It was Oxford’s blanket. We also put his little Yeti, a little toy that we got Enzi from Animal Kingdom but that Oxford loved and had taken it as his months ago, by his mouth so that he would always have a toy. We buried him in the back yard, in “the campsite” part of the yard where he spent so much time chasing rabbits and finding random strange bones in the woods.
I’m going to miss Oxford corralling Enzi when we went to the playground and him going down the slides just like a kid. Enzi giving him frozen corn dog nuggets to chew on so that he wouldn’t steal Enzi’s heated up ones.
Laughing at the way Oxford slept on his back, all twisted up. I just miss everything about him.

I hope that wherever he is, he is happy and running around with lots of space and dirt to dig up. I hope that he knows that we love him and miss him and that we’ll always remember him.

We adopted Cornell yesterday. He’s not a replacement, and honestly, he hasn’t kept me from crying all the time, but we figure he might help the grieving process. Enzi needs a dog too. It was hard enough to have to tell him that Oxford was hurt and that he had gone bye-bye and wasn’t coming back.
I just wish that this was all an awful nightmare. That I could wake up and it would be Thursday morning and I would play with Oxford and leave him inside.

Ox-dog. We miss you!

Oxford

Welcome to the inner workings of my mind.  In here, I’ll share what I’m thinking about a whole bunch of different subjects.   Much like my own mind, this blog will invariably go off on tangents.  I’m in for the ride.

Nothing is really off limits here!